Grandparents are one of the best inventions.

Though living abroad has had its difficult moments.... It's times like this but I can't help but smile.
Alhamdulilah for having amazing grandparents for my kids.

Sibling Love <3

On the move again!

It's official. We have decided to move back to Canada. It's been an incredibly amazing time... but, it's time to go home.

We feel like it's been an extended vacation... We've made priceless memories that we will cherish for life time.... But, it's time to wrap up.

We've informed the kids this week... And there are mixed feelings, so to help them work through these feelings I asked them to write all the things they like about both Malaysia and Canada.

Inshallah we still have more than two months left. So hopefully we can focus on enjoying what we have left here and then be on our way back. <3

A brother, a sister and a turtle.

Yusuf's done grade two alhamdulilah!

Alhamdulillah Mashallah Yusuf completed the grade two curriculum.  I didn't think that I was the type of homeschooler who likes to follow the grade system strictly.. and Im still not, however following the Canadian Curriculum has helped us to stay motivated and productive.  We do supplement with other curriculum and Yusuf still has weaknesses in some subjects... but alhamdulillah, he worked hard so we wanted to reward him.  

We had a small family ceremony. Baba and I stood in the living room and got the kids to sit on the sofa.  Baba made a little speech about working hard and such... and then we presented him with a certificate.  

The pics speak for themselves. 

:)

Found this free printable online

Yum

Daughter

A daughter is the happy memories of the past, the joyful moments of the present, and the hope and promise of the future.

-Author Unknown

Goodnight Moon

An all time fave in our house, with all three kids.

But what makes it even that much more lovable, is when they read it together <3 

Goodbye Naani

We had an amazing past three months with Naani. We had so many adventures, lots of laughs, tons of cuddles and lots of learning moments.  We slowed down on the typical subjects and focused more on enjoying one another's company, reading lots, and also exploring some new things here in Malaysia.

Momma started driving.

Yusuf learned how to ride a two wheeler.

Ibraheem also got a new bike and is improving on his letter recognition / writing.

And Summaiya has a new freedom of walking, or should I say running around.

We took a walk around our neighborhood, which we discovered isn't as pedestrian friendly as I had hoped for; we probably will not be going on another walk again in our area.  But at least we did it.

We drove to new places.  I only got lost and accidentally ended up on the highway three times; but my sense of direction has improved drastically.  My husband desperately tried teaching me the roads before I started driving but things just didn't click until I did it on my own.

We were able to meet up with some homeschoolers here in KL and hope to continue to do so on a regular basis.

Not to mention the plane ride, elephant trekking through the rain forest, pony rides, road trips, amusement park, staying in a hut on the water, and many restaurants we visited...alhamdulilah it was a memorable experience.  

Saying goodbye to Naani was tough and we still miss her tons.  The house feels so empty after her leaving, but alhamdulilah for technology to stay in touch.  After being in vacation mode for three months, we are slowly getting back into our routine, eating out less, and settling back down.  

Living away from family has its ups and downs.  It goes without saying that having Naani come for three months was an awesome experience that we would have never had if we were still in Canada, but again it goes without saying that having to let go again is so hard.

Such is the nature of this world.  We can never have everything we want and always be with all those whom we love.  But alhamdulilah through the remembrance of Allah and His promises that He is with those who are patient, it becomes all worth it.

I know my babies have had their fair share of heartache having to say goodbye to loved ones.  But I pray that through this experience they also gain invaluable lessons and memories that they will carry with them throughout their lives.

Bully Too Close to Home

Taken from : http://www.handsfreemama.com/2013/12/10/the-bully-too-close-to-home/

During the two years of my overly distracted life, I communicated more to a screen than to the people in my family. My schedule was so tightly packed that I constantly found myself saying, “We don’t have time for that.” And because there wasn’t a minute to spare, that meant no time to relax, be silly, or marvel at interesting wonders along our path. I was so focused on my “agenda” that I lost sight of what really mattered.

Calling all the shots was a mean voice in my head. My internal drill sergeant was continually pushing me to make everything sound better, look better, and taste better. My body, my house, and my achievements were never good enough. Holding myself to such unattainable standards weighed heavily on my soul and my inner turmoil eventually spilled out at people I loved the most.

Sadly, there was one person in particular who bore the brunt of my discontent: my first-born daughter.

She could not make mess without me shaking my head in disappointment.

She could not forget her homework, her jacket, or her lunchbox without me making a big deal about it.

She could not spill,
stain,
break,
or misplace
without being made to feel like she’d made the worst mistake in the world.

Although it pains me to write this, I remember sighing heavily in annoyance when she fell down and hurt herself because it threw me off my “master schedule.” My daughter was not allowed to be a child who learned by trying and yes, sometimes failing.

The truth hurts, but the truth heals … and brings me closer to the person and parent I want to be.

Every time I came down hard on my daughter, I justified my behavior by telling myself I was doing it to help her—help her become more responsible, capable, efficient, and prepare for the real world.

I told myself I was building her up.

But in reality, I was tearing her down.

I vividly remember the day my mother was visiting from out-of-town. The children were playing alone in the basement. My younger daughter began crying hysterically. I ran downstairs fearing she was seriously hurt.

The first question out of my mouth was directed at my older daughter. “What did you do?” I asked angrily.

My child didn’t bother to explain that her little sister had slipped on the library book that was sitting on the bottom step. There really was no point. My beautiful child with humongous brown eyes that once held so much optimism looked defeated. Silent tears of a broken spirit slid down her face. My daughter knew it didn’t matter what she said, she’d still be wrong; it would still be her fault.

And there was my mother standing beside her, a silent witness to the whole ugly scene.

As my older daughter ran off to the sanctity of her bedroom, an unexpected question came out of my mouth. “You think I am too hard on her, don’t you?” I snapped.

My mom, who’d experienced her own difficult parenting moments and struggles, held no judgment in her eyes, only sadness. Her simple response of “yes” only confirmed what I knew in my heart.

I mustered up the courage to find the words that needed to be said. Apologizing didn’t come easily for someone who strived to make everything look perfect all the time, but I knew what needed to be said.

I found my child crumpled up like a dejected rag doll on top of her bed—her face puffy and red from crying.

“I’m sorry,” I mumbled.

My daughter didn’t move.

I sat down on the edge of her bed and began saying things I’d never said to another human being—not even myself. “I feel mad inside a lot. I often speak badly about myself in my head. I bully myself. And when I bully myself, it makes me unhappy and then I treat others badly—especially you. It is not right, and I am going to stop. I am not sure how, but I will stop. I am so very sorry,” I vowed trying not to cry.

My daughter looked unsure as to what to do with this confession, this unusual offering from her mother who rarely admitted any wrongdoing. I didn’t blame her for the skeptical look she gave me. I understood why she didn’t say anything back, but somewhere in those eyes I saw hope—hope that things could be different.

I desperately wanted things to be different too. It was time to stop being so hard on my child; it was time to stop being so hard on myself. I prayed I could stand up to the inner bully. I knew I needed an easy first step. I decided to use one simple word: STOP.

Within the hour, I had a chance to try it. The first critical thought that popped into my head arose as I was preparing to leave the house. I looked at my reflection and thought, “You look fat. You can’t go out looking like that.”

“Stop!” I assertively thought to myself, shutting down any further criticisms. Then I quickly turned away from the mirror and recited these words: “Only love today. Only love today.”

I used the same strategy when interacting with my child a few minutes later. Before any harsh words came out of my mouth about the way she was sloppily packing her bag of things, I cut off my inner critic by saying, “Stop! Only love today.” Then I swallowed the hurtful words and relaxed my disapproving face.

Within mere days of using the “stop” technique, I noticed a change. With a more positive thought process, it was easier to let go of the need to control, dictate, and criticize. In response, my daughter began taking more chances and began revealing her true passions. She started movie making and website design on the computer. She made doll furniture and clothing to sell in the neighborhood. She began baking new recipes without any help. Nothing she did was perfect. Nor was it mess-free or mistake-free, but the moment I said something positive, I saw her blossom a little more. That is when I began to clearly see beyond the mistakes and messes to what was truly important.

I began noticing my child’s inner beauty rather than looking for perfection on the outside.

I began paying more attention to the person she was rather than the successes she achieved.

I began letting her be who she was meant to be instead of some idealistic version I had in my head.

When I stopped being a bully to my child and myself opportunities for growth and connection opened up. Over time, significant progress was made. In a little less than two years on my journey to let go of perfection and distraction, I received the confirmation I never thought I would receive.

My daughter was outside before school tending to a garden she created smack dab in the middle of the yard. I watched from the kitchen window as she lovingly tended to her miniature plot. I was captivated by the utter joy on her face. She was clearly at peace.

Since my dad loves to garden and had taught my daughter a few things, I took a picture and sent my parents. Nothing could have prepared me for the gift I would receive in return.

My parents wrote: “Thank for this precious picture of our beautiful granddaughter. Over the last two years, we have seen a tremendous change in her. We no longer see a scared look in her eyes; she is less fearful about you being upset or impatient with her. She is much happier and more relaxed. She is thriving and growing into a content, creative, and nurturing person. We know for a fact the changes we see in her coincide with the changes we have also seen in you.”

My friends, I have the following message to offer anyone who wants to believe today can be different than yesterday:

If you think that criticizing, belittling, or critiquing yourself will make you smarter, fitter, or more valuable, please reconsider.

If you think badgering, bullying, or constantly correcting your child will make him or her more likable, more confident, or more successful, please reconsider.

Because the truth is this:

It’s hard to love yourself with a bully breathing down your neck.

It’s hard to love yourself when the one person who’s supposed love you unconditionally doesn’t.

It’s hard to become the person you’re supposed to be when you aren’t allowed to fall down and get back up.

If we want our children to become who they’re meant to be, let’s ease up. “Nobody’s perfect” can be two of the most empowering, healing words when said to oneself or to another human being.

Let’s stop the ridicule. Let’s stop the relentless pressure. Let’s stop the impossible pursuit of perfection.

Only love today, my friends. Only love today.

Because love is always a good place to start a new beginning.

Sepang

Alhamdulillah we enjoyed a nice family vacation (along with the cousins!) to a beautiful resort not to far from our place.  The huts were on the water which was pretty cool and we pretty much spend the day at the beach. We only stayed one night but mashallah it was an enjoyable time <3

Walking along the houses

The boys went hunting for crabs with Baba

The tiny crab that Yusuf caught and put in a water bottle.  Unfortunately when the cleaning ladies came for room service they threw the bottle out, probably without seeing the crab inside.

It was really neat to see how the tide came in and went out.  The water levels rose n fell quite a bit from night time to day time

The water huts

Walking to the beach with the cousins

Cousins and the beach <3

Boys having a mud fight...

Playing in the ocean til the sun set <3

Mess

Special

New Beginning

We haven't been doing much sit down work for the last couple months and I cant imagine well be doing too much in the near future.
But we will be learning lots about life, love and family...

Welcome Baby Summaiya <3

Moments like these...

...melt my heart mashaAllah <3 Especially when they spontaneously took out the books and blanket and positioned themselves on the sofa like this together, all while I was busy in the kitchen making dinner.

May Allah always keep their bond strong, Ameen.

What I am grateful for....

I want Yusuf to practice his writing skills more so Im trying to do it in an indirect way since the old fashioned writing drills dont exactly excite him.  Today I made a chart for him and asked him to write / draw four things which he is grateful for.  I was doing some housework while he did his homework and once in a while Id peek over his shoulder to see how he was doing.  I must admit I was a little disappointed that the first two things were materialistic... I was hoping hed choose something a little more meaningful ( I had given him no ideas or guidelines when I put the paper infront of him).  When he called me to show me that he was done my eyes kinda teared up and my heart was relived and grateful that he had chosen Mama and Baba to include in his short list <3

May Allah swt help us to raise grateful children, and always keep us all grateful to Him and to those around us, Ameen.

Family Trip to Niagra

Alhamdulilah we had a short, but very nice, family trip to Niagra Falls.  Since my husband works all hours of the week, he is occasionally able to take time off of work during the week.  It was really nice going during the week because there were NO crowds anywhere!  A few months ago we bought groupons for the Bird Kingdom and they were about to expire so we planned a trip.  We left Tues morning, had a hotel for one night and stayed until Wed evening.  We were blessed with amazing weather and really enjoyed each others company. Im really enjoying the boys ages now... they're becoming little people and its so exciting to watch them having fun. <3

Baba and his boys on the boat to go see the falls!

Yusuf checking out the falls @ night

@ Bird Kingdom

@ Bird Kingdom looking at the fish

Tryin to get the parrots to talk

Brothers playing soccer

A childhood isnt complete without being swung around in circles like this!

More soccer!

Rules for Mothers with Sons

MashaAllah a really well written article.
When I was pregnant with Yusuf I wanted a girl SO badly! But Allah swt knew what was best for me and I couldnt have ever imagined how much I'd love being a Momma to boys!  People keep saying hopefully baby #3 will be a girl, but honestly, in the end, Allah knows whats best and I'd be just as happy with another boy <3
Click here.

Syria cont'd

Yesterday Baba went to the dollar store to get money rolls for all the money that Yusuf has collected.  This morning after breakfast the four of us (Ibby too!) sat down, sorted, counted and rolled all the change.  [We could have just gone to the grocery store and put it all in those machines that do it for you, but this way there was more involvement and learning :) ! ] .  MashaAllah the total so far is $583.  This has all been due to Yusuf's effort.  I must say I am inspired and proud of the courage he has... its not easy going around asking people for money but his determination to help his brothers and sisters in Syria has given him the motivation to do so!
May Allah SWT always guide him and keep his heart soft towards helping his brothers and sisters around the world and continue to make him an inspiration for us, Ameen! <3

100 Ways to be Kind to your Child

[Taken from : http://creativewithkids.com/ ]

Tell to your child:

1. I love you.
2. love you no matter what.
3. I love you even when you are angry at me.
4. I love you even when I am angry with you.
5. I love you when you are far way.  My love for you can reach you wherever you are.
6. If I could pick any 4 year old (5 year old, 6 year old…) in the whole wide world, I’d pick you.
7. I love you to the moon and then around the stars and back again.
8. Thank you.
9. I enjoyed playing with you today.
10. My favorite part of the day was when I was with you and we were _______.

Tell them:
11. The story of their birth or adoption.
12. About how you cuddled them when they were a baby.
13. The story of how you chose their name.
14. A story about yourself when you were their age.
15. A story about how their grandparents met.
16. What your favorite color is.
17. That sometimes you struggle too.
18. That when you’re holding hands and you give three squeezes, it’s a secret code that means, “I love you”.
19. What the plan is.
20. What you’re doing right now.

Play:
21. Freeze Tag
22. Uno
23. Crazy 8s
24. Gin Rummy
25. Memory
26. Go Fish
27. I Spy- especially when you’re tired of driving and feel snappish
28. Catch

Pretend:
29. To catch their kiss and put it on your cheek.
30. That their tickle tank is empty and you have to fill it.
31. That their high five is so powerful it nearly knocks you over.
32. That you are super ticklish.
33. That you are explorers in the amazing new world of your backyard.
34. That it’s party day!  Decorate for no reason!

Try:
35. To get enough sleep.
36. To drink enough water.
37. To eat decent food.
38. Wearing earrings, or whatever makes you feel pretty.
39. Calling a friend the next time you feel like you are about to lose it with the kids.
40. Giving a gentle touch to show approval, rather than saying something.
41. Dancing in the kitchen.
42. To get your kids to bop to the music with you in the car.
43. Showing your kids that you can do a somersault or handstand or a cartwheel.
44. Keeping that sigh to yourself.  Just jump in and help clean up cheerfully.
45. Using a kind voice, even if you have to fake it.

Read:
46. A book of silly poems.
47. A book and then act it out. (Like “I’m going on a Bear Hunt”)
48. Your favorite childhood book to them.
49. When the afternoon is starting to go astray.
50. Outside under a tree.
51. In the library kids corner.
52. The comic book they love that you’re not so hot on.
53. About age appropriate behavior so you can keep your expectations realistic.

Listen:
54. To your child in the car.
55. To that Lego description, and think how important it is to your child.
56. For that question that indicates your child really needs your input.
57. One second longer than you think you have patience for.
58. For the feelings behind your child’s words.

Ask:
59. Why do you think that happens?
60. What do you think would happen if______?
61. How shall we find out?
62. What are you thinking about?
63. What was your favorite part of the day?
64. What do you think this tastes like?

Show:
65. Your child how to do something instead of banning them from it.
66. How to whistle with a blade of grass.
67. How to shuffle cards- make a bridge if you can!
68. How to cut food.
69. How to fold laundry.
70. How to look up information when you don’t know the answer.
71. Affection to your spouse.
72. That taking care of yourself is important.

Take Time:
73. To watch construction sites.
74. To look at the birds.
75. To allow your child to help you dump ingredients in the bowl.
76. To walk places together.
77. To dig in the dirt together.
78. To do a task at your child’s pace.
79. To just sit with you child while they play.

Trust:
80. That your child is capable.
81. That you are the right parent for your child.
82. That you are enough.
83. That you can do what is right for your family.

Delight your child:
84. Clean your child’s room as a surprise.
85. Put chocolate chips in the pancakes.
86. Put a love note in their lunch.
87. Make their snack into a smile face shape.
88. Make sounds effects while you help them do something.
89. Sit on the floor with them to play.

Let Go:
90. Of the guilt.
91. Of how you thought it was going to be.
92. Of your need to be right.

Give:
93. A look with Kind Eyes to your child.
94. A smile when your child walks into the room.
95. A kind touch back when your child touches you.
96. The chance to connect before you correct so that your child can actually hear your words.
97. Your child a chance to work out their frustrations before helping them.
98. A bath when the day feels long.
99. A hug.
100. You get to choose the next one!  What is your favorite way to be kind to your child

Love You Forever

Tonight before bed we read "Love You Forever."  After I finished reading it, I told Yusuf that one day hes going to be big and have a wife, and kids, and a house, and a car, and a job and hell be busy but he can never forget about us.  And then I was telling him about how Momma and Baba did so much for him when he was small: play with him, wash him, feed him... and Yusuf added:  vacuumed for him.  Then I told him how when we get old he will have to take care of us.  We also spoke about the dua from the Quran which translates as " Oh Allah take care of my parents like they took care of me when I was small."  Within a minute Yusufs face went red and his eyes filled with tears and he barely managed to get the words out, "But Ill miss you."  My heart sunk!  I told him its okay to feel sad and that Ill miss him too, but well always be a family!  Then more tears flowed as he told me that hell miss us when we die.  (This is when my tears started to come too)  I told him that we have to be really good muslims and make dua so that we can go to Jannah and be together forever and how well never feel sad in Jannah.  He asked me if his grandmother will take care of him when we die.  I told him inshaAllah we wont die until he is older and by then he will be able to take care of himself.  But for now we are together and we should be happy for that.  I also said that no matter what happens Ill always love him, and that Allah is the Only One who will be able to be with him all the time and Allah will always take care of him.

It was not an easy conversation, but I am grateful it came out.  I think we both learned some important lessons.

Yusuf, may Allah swt always keep your heart soft towards your parents.  We will make mistakes, but we have and will always try our best to do whats right.  May Allah fill your heart with mercy towards us especially when we are older.  And may Allah allow us to be a means of Jannah for you, Ameen.

I love you forever.